And yet another blogging innovation from me! Will I ever stop?! Heh. Starting from today, I'll aim to post a song idea every week from my very vast collection of ideas... really, I probably have enough ideas already to last the next freakin' decade at this rate. I figured, I'm writing all this shit and absolutely no one is seeing it! So at least now I'll put some stuff out there. Just bare with me on this as it'll involve manually updating the text box & this post, unlike my picture/song idea scraps to the left where that was all uploaded in one go and made into a slideshow.
Week 1: I'll start this off with a very short saying I recently came up with. What I mean by it is, as time progresses, it's getting more and more undignified to live - it's becoming more difficult to stay "sane". As I've come to realise for myself lately, time is a very powerful thing. Perhaps the most powerful thing in the universe?
Week 2: Second week in and it's Mon 8th Nov, so at least I remembered to catch up on this! So with this saying I tried to be a bit clever, as "ones" & "zeroes" are essentially the digits "1" & "0" - and you may or may not know that these two numbers make up a thing called "binary", hence the song name (in progress) I've given this: 'Like Binary'. What I mean from this lyric is that you might think you're special/unique, until you step outside in your local area & you feel like a nobody, amongst all the "some-ones" and other "zeroes". Well that's how I feel when I step outside into town anyway... it seems like everyone is acquainted with a purpose & establishment, and I'm just a guy... a guy who writes all these songs and plays guitar, but goes unnoticed to the outside world...
Week 3: Another week, another recent song idea. Here I'm talking about the "good boy" in me, in keeping with my expectancy to grow into a man whilst still retaining my child-like innocence/values, with pleasing the elders of my family. The corroded me is the "killer" in me; the one who needs to listen to controversial bands like Soundgarden and Smashing Pumpkins to keep me sane; the one who disobeys the rules which he believes are already broken; the one who doesn't feel like conforming to anything or anyone any more. I don't have the same child-like innocence I once had, due to the "mind-fuck" situations I've been through in my life, therefore simply can't, nor should I, be expected to stay "gold" in the eyes of my parents and grandparents... gold isn't particularly susceptible to retaining its natural sheen once exposed to predominantly miserable weather... if you get what I mean.
Week 4: This lyric's about how musical acts/artists become "cult" status over time: so what hope does one just starting off have? Are we all destined to become "shadows" within the moulds of our successful elders? I feel that this is the all-too unfortunate general agenda/vibe... being that the later you (decide to) become a star, it's like you're automatically set to the bottom of your generations "food-chain", and you can't really make your way up 'cos we're all confined to the shadows of past greats. As for me personally, I really hate to be a victim to this and generally avoid conforming to our "modern" times when I can. I write my songs and aim to go about my attitude in life like it was still the alt. rock phenomena of the 90s - with real intention. But it seems that everyone's "moved on", leaving the real influential decades all but behind us... like, "sorry kiddo, but you were born too late". Now that's the attitude I HATE. So what, I can't be my real self in today's time, I have to reign "out of touch" in this dumbed-down generation? Well not if I can solely help it...! I almost digress being born no sooner than I was, but it makes me feel sorry and disappointed for anyone born post-2000s really. We really are an oppressed people these days...
Week 5: In my personal experience of being in music education, there's this feeling of bias I tend to silently pick-up on surrounding musical vibes of past and present + the (unfortunately dumbass-majority) students of this generation... like, for example, the whole turning a blind eye to that - not even very long ago - world-shaking, influential revolt of the 90s... ya know, the one that combined rebellion (against politics, religion etc.) and opposed common beliefs and myths and general conformities, with TRUE purpose, whilst retaining value and integrity, and, not to mention, having actual talent: from soaringly heavy to almost-spiritual yet-intricate guitaring, and gutsy vocals + often-awkward time signatures, and unpredictable tempo changes. Now it seems mostly that "modern" (music/vibes, et al.) is the only (successful) way forward. The agenda pretty much all lecturers/elders that I've encountered give off is: the 90s alt. rock/metal "grunge" scene was degrading, silly, and can't/shouldn't EVER be repeated - dare you be fool enough to try and bring it back; it died; it's now forbidden - be a "rule-abiding conformist" instead like everyone else today; kiss Kurt Cobain's holy ring. Experienced "expert" lecturers teaching the young naturally take command of the class, and anything said presumably goes with those who are easily manipulated. I've come to realise this "invisible barrier" is everywhere, affecting everyone... do you know your rights as a human being - one who had no choice but be born to this world? Be brave, be bold. Aim to appease Earth God. Or reign by default with the sheeple.
Week 6: This one is so true to me. For all the hell that I've been through, I'm entitled to be an asshole, quite frankly. I want to be a performing dark songwriter, not out of desire, but because it's what I feel that my life has led me to become. The same goes for anyone and everyone; if you want to do well in your field/occupation, you must be what life has made you to be; if there can be no turning back, there should be no holding back. You are the way you are for a reason, fuck what anyone else thinks; you shouldn't have to succumb to anyone if you feel you're not worthy enough for them. If people were to understand you, they would accept you for who you are.
Week 7: Here's one I recently came to thinking. A "chump", in this case, would allow his hardships in life to drag him down, letting the world know about it through his everyday excursions, i.e. the way that he talks to people; the attitude portrayed; effectively taking down other people with him. Having been through and coming to terms with my own hell ride, I generally avoid being the asshole that I'm entitled to be. BUT I DON'T forget! That way I can be my "sane", friendly, easy-to-talk-to self YET be able to address my past issues later, i.e. not pretending they never happened; not fucking myself over in that respect, 'cos that'd be foolish of me for the amount of times that shit has actually happened! Now if only everyone knew how to be more thoughtful and considerate, maybe they wouldn't end up "hurting" themselves (and others) when it may not even be necessary to do so... just think that you are your own best friend so treat yourself that way; cherish your existence; live to love. And that saying, "forgive and forget", yeah it's silly. Sure, you'd be in your right mind to "forgive" once an understanding has been agreed, but to "forget" the thing that has caused you pain... well, you're only opening yourself up for it to happen again!
Week 8: Something I wrote half a year ago; where has that time gone?! This sorta ties in with the lyric above it from Week 7; how I manage to not be the asshole I'm entitled to be reflects in how "stable" I compose myself. My feelings can be rather deceptive, and not necessarily in my favour... especially in those dark times, when it wasn't always easy going about my life as the once-"golden" video game music enthusiast to having that taken away from me and being left to "positive-outlook" everything with the only bands I knew: Feeder, Yellowcard, and, at the time, recently-discovered Ash. It was only around June 2010 that those other bands: Smashing Pumpkins, and Soundgarden, started to click with me... just going to show how much more true-to-life these older, more influential bands really are... they showed me that it's OK to be angry without having to feel guilty or doubtful; that it's OK to be imperfect, and to just let your true colours shine for what they are; no holding back.
W3 07/11/10 "It isn't easy staying gold - when what you need's what makes you corrode"
W4 18/08/10 "Penetrate through the decades of musical history flown by, now's MY time - don't doubt I-WILL try!"
W5 10/08/10 "Hidden bias - clouding all around, it's an invisible barrier - trying to dumb you down"
W6 15/11/10 "Don't matter who you are or where you're from, you've got to be what life throws at you"
W7 13/12/10 "I ain't no chump - but I don't try to forget"
W8 14/06/10 "How do I manage to be so chilled, how do I manage to stay so sane, when what really lies beneath my skin is a longing to be free of - this - pain"
W = Week commencing | Date = When originally wrote | Bold = Extended lyric
